Monday, February 05, 2001
I spent a wonderful, glorious weekend in the newly renovated basement. It looks ultra-great. (speaking of ultra, whatever happened to Ultrashag?) It's not totally done yet, but it is soooo close, it was worth just wandering around down there, imagining where my office chair was going to go, how I was going to have things set up, etc.. The walls are painted, the trim and baseboards are up, the carpet is in, the doors are hung (with doorhandles), the plumbing is all in place, and it feels REAL comfortable. We haven't paid the electrician, the painter or the general contractor, but that should happen this week (ouch).
... As I just read the paragraph above, and look back at past No Comments, I realize how different my priorities have become from what I might have held dear even five years ago. Why is this project so important to me? Perhaps because it holds a place for me to retreat to, a sanctuary where things are how I like them, where I left them and untouched since I left them.
As little as six months ago, I made a decision to make a go of the life that I have found myself in. Many people (men, my age and position in life, I'm guessing) have tried to express the sort of things that they are feeling right now. Some run away, some change in radical or goofy ways, and some philosophise. I like to think that I fall into the last camp. The last four years have seen me metamorphasize from a young adult (in mind mind, at least) into an older adult. I went through some very rough times, times that saw me forsake my family to persue my own shadow. That shadow was me, but it was cast by a man who had less respect and regard for the true well being of those I associated with. I like to think that time has made me wiser.
Time to head for bed before I get all mushy and philosphica-
Oops. Too late.