I found something at the grocery store that just made my day - a simple brass sprinkler. I've been on the lookout for a new sprinkler, as we have one of the percussion types which works great in an arc, but not so great in a small area. I have been looking for a handy, simple sprinkler for some time now - did you know Canadian Tire has 44 different types of sprinklers?
This little fella (that I found for $3.50) is a straight diffuser. It has no moving parts so it won't ever break through use, and you ALWAYS know which way it is going to start spraying - straight up. Due to the pattern in the top, it just diffuses the water in a nice rectangular shape, and I can control the volume (and hence the size of the rectangle) at the faucet. It is small and therefore won't take up much space in the tool shed, and has a heavy and wide-enough base to land with a satisfying but inaudible thunk when dropped onto the grass.
Hail my newfound garden implement. It will be serving me long into my senior years, and may even be an item that my children need to dispose of when dividing up my worldly possessions upon my demise.
Sometimes it's the simple things that please you.