Long and hard have I thought about a nickname for my swim coach. The fact that she needed a nickname was something that really didn’t make itself apparent until I had spent some time hanging out with my swim buddies and talking about her. Jenn, my wife, or Jen, the swim coach? Too much room for confusion. Definitely, the time had come.

Most of the obvious nicknames were just that - too obvious. Jenster or Jenmeister lacked the originality that I like to think is the hallmark of my work. Also, basing her nickname on some of the more apparent physical traits would have been so last week. Carrot Top (her red hair), Spot (for her freckles), Legs (her height), … way too pedestrian. I wanted some sort of moniker that would alert people to the inner Jen, the secret, untapped Jen that I’ve come to know and appreciate. Finally, on Monday, it came to me during a workout. We were invited to bring music and, being my turn and having not had time to prepare anything, I grabbed an old heavy metal workout tape from the ‘90s. Well, the more the tape played, the more Jen perked right up. “Hey, I this one’s a great song, too,” she’d say, time and time again.

All of the other women in my life (the ones that I’ll admit to knowing, anyway) have never really warmed up to the likes of ZZ Top, Golden Earring, The Tragically Hip; but she seemed to like this stuff. That and her long, attention-getting hair has sealed the deal.

Welcome to the show, Jay.